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Old 12-08-2022, 16:09   #1876
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Re: Jokes Thread

Alexa, tell me a joke..... Alexa?

Sorry, I wasn't listening, I thought you deserved some privacy

Really, well that's nic-

Would you like me to tell you another joke
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Old 18-08-2022, 12:38   #1877
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Re: Jokes Thread

"I won't back down" - Tom Petty

"I may readjust my stance if you have a convincing argument"- Tom Reasonable
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Old 18-08-2022, 17:32   #1878
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Re: Jokes Thread

Rough neighbourhood.

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Old 20-08-2022, 21:11   #1879
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Re: Jokes Thread

I opened my fridge earlier, and it smelt of Basil.


I think it might me faulty
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Old 29-08-2022, 13:55   #1880
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Re: Jokes Thread

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Old 19-11-2022, 01:01   #1881
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Re: Jokes Thread

So I put a giant map of the world up on the wall and gave my wife a dart. I told her wherever it lands is where we go on holiday.

Well......I guess we're spending three weeks behind the fridge.
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Old 23-11-2022, 19:05   #1882
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Re: Jokes Thread

Here's a funny for you all.
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Old 04-07-2023, 22:35   #1883
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Re: Jokes Thread

Just asked my daughter to pass me the phone book

She laughed, called me a dinosaur and gave me her iPhone

Now the spider is dead, the phone is broken and she's furious
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Old 05-07-2023, 00:27   #1884
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Re: Jokes Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by TheDaddy View Post
Just asked my daughter to pass me the phone book

She laughed, called me a dinosaur and gave me her iPhone

Now the spider is dead, the phone is broken and she's furious
I've stolen it.
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Old 03-08-2023, 04:41   #1885
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I found this and thought it should be seen by our own Govt if no one else!!



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Old 18-08-2023, 13:13   #1886
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Re: Jokes Thread

Little Red Riding Hood is walking through the forest when she spots the wolf hiding behind a log

"Wow what big eyes you have got"

The wolf runs off

Then she sees him hiding behind a tree

"Wow what big ears you have got"

The wolf runs off again

She then sees him hiding in a ditch

"Wow what big teeth you've got"

This time the wolf stands up and says

"Look can you sod off, I'm trying to have a shit"
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Old 04-09-2023, 16:09   #1887
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Re: Jokes Thread

Had a massive argument with the other half earlier and she ended up packing my bags, as I was walking out the door she screamed

"I hope you have a slow and painful death you barsteward"

So naturally I assumed she wanted me to stay and went to unpack
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Old 04-09-2023, 17:46   #1888
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Re: Jokes Thread

I told my mate that I have had the sh*ts for almost 6 weeks.
"Don't worry", he said, "They go back to school tomorrow".
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Old 04-09-2023, 20:12   #1889
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Re: Jokes Thread

This made me laugh....
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Old 07-09-2023, 12:27   #1890
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Re: Jokes Thread

I'm sweating more in this heat than Fred West on Ground Force.
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